Even though my emotional and physical scars still run deep I do feel that many aspects of my life are returning somewhat to normal. I work, spend time with Angela and friends and socialize often. There are often hours during the day when I am able to forget about the cancer and my experiences.
I often spend time thinking through the events of the past few months. Now that the worst is over I have to process a lot of what happened with amore healthy mind. Some of it feels like a strange dream, some of it is hard to believe.
I have to say that I am not happy at the moment...but I am at peace. A great gift considering my feelings just two months ago.
5 comments:
So, now you can come out here to the beautiful west, get away from that snow and cold and get happy again! I'm waiting!
I certainly hope that after more time passes you'll be able to feel more happiness. Your ordeal was so overwhelming and you were so courageous throughout. It makes sense that your recovery will take some time.
But there was an enormous outpouring of love for you through this blog and a tremendous community created as a result. I am honoured to be a part of it.
Like others who faithfully observe your progress, I am hopeful that you'll soon feel happy and healthy and like that horrible time is truly behind you.
I guess I/we all thought that you would just get right back to normal and carry on, not realizing that you have been to hell and back and that there has to be alot of emotional baggage attached to that. I do hope that time will help heal, and that it will all feel like a really bad dream, sometime soon. I can't imagine how scarey it must be, thinking that it might all start over again, but you have come through so much and done so well, that I have all the faith in the world that you are going to carry on forever!!! Take Care and enjoy your trip with Clint
Hey dude, it's good to hear you say you are at peace, that's deep man and I'd suggest a better way of evaluating mental and spiritual health than happiness. Happiness is a good thing but it's usually based on external situations - happenings - which, as you well know can be shitty and can't be happy. That said, I also believe that we need to be happy once in awhile - not to often but once in awhile. I try to be as happy as much as I can - legally and healthy, and it's hard. I pray you get there once in awhile, not too often but as much as you can handle and still be peaceful.
ok olaf -hört sich gut an. Mach weiter so und denk an unser vorhaben.Der Sack muß zu !
tiko
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